So this past summer I did a little self-evaluation. Through this I found who I am, who I want to be, and who I want to be with one day.
This is who I am. I am a woman who is earnestly seeking the heart of God. I truly want to be a girl that for a guy to seek my heart, he must first seek Christ's. I know I have flaws, but I want to constantly improve on my imperfections. I want someone that loves me for who I am yet encourages me to be the best woman I can be. I want my heart to be the center of my beauty. I want to be a vessel that is broken so that Christ can be seen through me. I want to be an encourager to all of those around me.
To go with what I want to do and be I also want this for myself. I want a strong spiritual leader. I was a man, who believes that I am his and while I am submissive to him I am still an intellect equal. I want someone who challenges my thinking. I want to talk about weighty matters, philosophy, theology, emotions and why they are so. I want to be the only person that the person notices when I enter the room. I want them to find me beautiful and desire to seek my heart everyday. I want to be treated like a princess, at the same time I want to grow into a lady deserving of being treated so.
I want my relationship to completely be focused on the happiness on my partners happiness, in turn I want them to be completely focused on mine as well. With this I don't see how either of us could be unhappy. I believe in 1 Corinthians 13 when it says that "love is not self seeking." I believe that love is a team effort. Each party must be willing to put equal amounts of effort into the relationship. Before I have taken this for granted. Love is selfless, a person must be completely willing to put the other before their self. This is love, a sacrificial love.
I want a man who is a leader. Whether is be of a congregation, class room, youth group...Just a man that is willing to lead and serve. As I have a passion to lead and serve I think that the man I am to be with might have the same passion. This leader must be a compassionate one, a heart that is more than willing to love others. This is an important aspect in a good leader and man. I guess a Christ like leader. I want me and whoever I am with to strive together to build each other up in being better Christians. I want to be my partners accountability partner with their devotions and everything they he may struggle with. I want to be his encourager in every way possible. Whether it be as a ear to listen, a shoulder to cry on, or just a heart to love. This is what I want to be for them. However, I do want the same for me as well. All in all I assume I want a strong Christ like heart in a man.
This may sound like a advertisement for myself. It's not. I've come to grips that God may have called me to not just limit all my love to one man and just expand it to children all over the world. Which both are wonderful journeys that I'm more than excited to take. I just believe that love is something God has given me to share and I want to do so to the fullest.
I guess I write this because lately most guys I have met that are interested in me don't truly understand what they are getting in to. There's so much for a person, even as a loyal friend, need to know about me. Even the one's that assume that they know me the best don't completely know me. I'm saving that for the one I can completely trust. Whether or not they even come through my lifetime. However, it's saved away. These are just some of the basics of what I believe I deserve and also what my partner deserves.
I feel like there's more that I could expound upon, however I would have to assume you would care to know. If you do ask. If you don't I understand. Thanks for reading my thoughts either way.
